Tuesday, July 24, 2012

SUMMER VINYASA

Wake up with the birds and the sun. Check to make sure the dog is still alive.  Clean rat shit off the butcher block. Take tart dough out of the freezer. Make a hella strong cup of coffee. Ninja your way into your son's locked room and find him asleep with a pocket knife, Liquid Paper, and a spy pen. Offer eggs. Offer oatmeal. Offer cinnamon toast. Watch your kids' eyes bug out above the cinnamon toast when you rant about the importance of gun control. Pile into the car. Tell your daughter you're sorry but you just can't explain Pink's lyrics it's just you and your hand tonight. End up at Target. Try to talk your daughter out of the short short denim shorts. Try to talk yourself out of the hot pink bikini. Buy both. Yell at a woman in a black SUV to slow down bitch and pick a fucking lane already. Boil garlic cloves in olive oil. Listen to your daughter do a mama-style door slam when you tell her she can't have a new iPod. Pour hot garlic oil over cherry tomatoes and simmer them with salt, sugar, and lemon thyme. Consider returning the hot pink bikini. Ask your son how much he loves you and shiver when he says mama I love you neverending and forever. Assemble your third cherry tomato, garlic confit, and anchovy tart of the week. Drink a martini and cut your son's hair. Regret being that annoying mom who says you don't like anchovies what is wrong with you? Smile when your daughter offers to do the dishes. Snuggle in bed with your daughter and allow her to pet your head. Sit down at the computer to try to articulate your excitement about this tart and realize you're so tired that all that you can write is I fucking love this tart I fucking love this tart I fucking love this tart. Crawl into bed without brushing your teeth and notice you're still wearing your apron. Hug your dog and mumble who the heck do I think I am attempting to do anything around here except trying to keep all of you creatures alive? Wake up at 3 a.m. drenched in sweat. Check on your kids. Go back to sleep until your screaming son wakes you up at 5 a.m. Lie down forehead to forehead until his nightmare fades and he drifts back to sleep. Flip on the kitchen lights and say good morning motherfuckers to the rats. Watch the sun rise. Eat some cold tomato and anchovy tart. Clean the rat shit off the butcher block. Make a hella strong cup of coffee. Remove the tags and tuck the hot pink bikini into your underwear drawer.



CHERRY TOMATO, GARLIC CONFIT, AND ANCHOVY TART
This tart would be super tasty made with pizza dough or puff pastry.
Make sure to prepare the tart dough a few hours ahead of time. It works better to cool garlic confit and tomato mixture before assembling tart. But if you're in hurry then just throw it all together and it will be fine. And if anchovies gross you out, skip them. Corn is a wonderful addition. Or  spread under the tomatoes a layer of goat cheese mixed with 1 egg, salt, and heavy cream. Play. Maybe some pancetta? Prosciutto? Or an egg or two cracked on the tart? I'm hungry.

ingredients:
1 1/2 times this recipe for tart dough, refrigerated for a few hours (or just make double and saves scraps for mini-tarts)
1  head of garlic confit, cooled
2 pints cherry tomatoes (any kind, color, or size)
2 tablespoons garlic confit oil
4 sprigs lemon thyme (or regular thyme)
big pinch kosher salt
big pinch white sugar
2 tablespoons Dijon mustard (I love Grey Poupon)
at least 10 anchovy fillets (packed in oil)
parmesan or pecorino cheese

directions: 
Roll tart dough into desired shape. You can press it into a large tart pan or leave it free form on a sheet pan. Refrigerate until needed. Put garlic oil in medium-sized pot on medium heat. Add tomatoes, thyme, salt, and sugar. Cook and stir until tomatoes soften just a bit (about 3 minutes). A few tomatoes will probably explode. Take off heat and cool to room temperature.

Preheat oven to 350°F.

Spread mustard over cold tart dough leaving about 1/2" at the edges. Strain tomato mixture and save remaining broth for soup (very important or tart will be soggy). Spread cooked tomatoes all over tart dough. Drape anchovies over the tomatoes. Squeeze garlic confit cloves out of skins and onto the tart (I like placing a clove next to each anchovy fillet). If you want, place a few more cloves in the center of the tart along with the thyme sprigs. Grate cheese all over. Paint exposed tart dough edges with garlic oil.

Bake until nice and brown and beautiful. It should take between 30 and 40 minutes. A good test is to pick up the corner of the tart and see if it's floppy or firm. Take it out when it doesn't bow at all. Or, if you like it a bit gooey, take it out when it's not quite firm.

Eat right away. Maybe with arugula and avocado bowls and anchovy salad dressing.

21 comments:

  1. As a new(ish) mom, I really appreciate your words and honesty. I love reading your blog, it's amazing!

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  2. No tomatoes up here in the cold Pacific Northwest yet, but I am bookmarking this. I was so happy to have a new post from you to read with my own cup of strong coffee this morning.

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  3. Every morning calls for a hella strong cup around here. We recently had a pet rat (that we were babysitting) lost In Our House, and then captured and then Lost In Our Car. Sun gold cherry tomatoes coming on here in Colorado just in time for this recipe. Rock the bikini. (also, if you tell your daughter something about our hands on our bodies feeling good I bet she won't even be surprised).

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    1. a rat lost in your car? hard to imagine having a rat as a pet. not sure that's going to happen around here!

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  4. Way to keep that bikini. Add that to the growing list of things I admire about you....

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    1. thanks, carolyn. now i just have to have the guts to wear it!

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  5. Love reading your posts...and honest window into your day. Tomato confit: heaven. By the way, continue to be obsessed with homemade creme fraiche. It's now a fridge staple. Latest iteration was with chives and dill over grilled salmon.

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  6. Amen to snuggling with the dog. I sympathize with Dash's nightmares, makes me wish my Mama was here. Fuck rats and cockroaches! Oh and skunks. What's up with NYC parks being over run by SKUNKS! Not dog friendly! Fuck is the only word in my vocabulary given my current state of non-sanity. I wish I had time to make this tart but I am in finals hell. Only a 1.2 weeks left and then I'm free for a MONTH. Home to CA from humid hell. Wear the pink bikini and flaunt it!!!!!!!! :) As always, your writing makes me smile and feel like someone else gets my crazy :)) xo

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    1. anyuta. i love your passion! you're close. keep breathing. california soon!

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  7. I shall consider this tart recipe *with anchovies* my new downward facing dog.

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  8. Seriously, rats? No wonder the nightmares!!

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  9. Awesome post. Love it. I've had that same problem (but with mice, our rat lives OUTSIDE in our deck garden...) and it took about a month of killing the adorable little things for the morning clean up of our kitchen counters and dining room table to finally stop. Finally. Then we got this rat that lives under our deck and digs up all our plants and happily and competently eats the bait out of our havahart trap. Time to stop having a heart, me thinks... Also, the tart looks great :)

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  10. Having my Hella Strong Cup as I read your post. I always wait for time alone to read "em (i.e. about 6 am when the kids are still asleep and the husband is farming)
    Sometimes I wonder too why I attempt anything else besides keepin' everyone alive... but then I can not stop myself from making my sourdough a or a birthday cake...
    Love your blog, always look forward to it. I love a mom who drinks, swears cooks and drinks coffee... oo shit little one waking up:"MOMMM!!!!!! gotta go!

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  11. It's still foggy around here. Cold even- hope you have that bikini on.

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    1. i'm scared of it. it's still in the drawer.

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  12. such a good read!

    and, the thumbs up to hot pink bikini, you deserve it!


    I made your apricot tart and is was really good, so I will be trying this one too.

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  13. New to your site. I love it. The rat shit: just like certain sisyphean roach problems we have at home. Thankgod for a blogger who'll admit to the realities of home kitchens in which people actually cook, and bleach, and cook, and boil and cook, and try to clean up after beasties sullying the cooking process. Food looks delicious. Love the yoga reference. Looking forward to reading more.

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  14. This tart that you love so much looks DELICIOUS and perfectly summer charred, summer bright, summer fresh. I always enjoy reading your blog. It is refreshing and inspiring to read a food blog that takes such a non-linear and poetic narration and still offer the very practical: a recipe as a point of reference. Keep em coming!

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  15. Brilliant. I felt every possible emotion reading this. I love when I take the time to snuggle with my daughter, letting her pet my hair. Your tart looks delicious, too. :)

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  16. ditto to the every emotion :) Reading this makes me shiver!

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